Trennis Harvey Recently I was reading a book and came across something called “Rules for Being Human”. Rule # 1- You will learn lessons Rule # 2-There are no mistakes-only lessons Rule # 3 – A lesson is repeated until it is learned. Rule # 4 – If you don’t learn the easy lessons, they get harder. Rule # 5 – You’ll know you’ve learned a lesson when your actions change. None of us is perfect and none of us have a “perfect marriage.” We all have some area(s) of personal growth (sometimes we recognize them and sometimes we don’t) that can help us to become better spouses if we change actions and/or thoughts. If we as spouses fail to learn from our imperfections not only do our marriages pay the price, but those around us (children, extended family, co-workers, etc.) pay a big ransom as well. For this reason spousal feedback is an integral component to nourish our personal growth within our marriages. Marital Feedback is the breakfast of champions! It is a tool that we can use to become better and better in our goal to have a marriage in which both spouses work towards satisfaction spiritually, physically, emotionally, intellectually, financially, socially, recreationally, & healthily. When one receives feedback from a spouse, it should be regarded as a lesson to learn from that is used to change your course of action in a way that better supports the success of your marriage. Feedback should not be viewed as something you need to defend yourself against. Remember, “Feedback is the breakfast of champions!” When feedback is disregarded, you are on the path to failure and making easy lessons harder and harder. Remember, it becomes insanity when we have to learn the same lessons over and over again. We must move on to the next lesson (and believe me it will come sooner rather than later) and continue to build ourselves and the confidence of our spouses in the marriage. So consider giving your spouse feedback on a regular basis. Once you receive it, use the feedback to do personal reflections and act accordingly. I guarantee that you will become an even better individual and your marriage will continue to grow as a result.
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