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30 Lessons From 30 Years

Just you, just me, always together I made up my mind years ago When I first gazed upon you, I'd never let you go And it's amazing baby

How we loved each other so And we'll always be (always be) Always together

It was 30 years ago this week that we danced to those lyrics at our wedding reception. Always Together by The Dells. Perfect lyrics to mark the beginning of a life together. As we celebrate 30 years of ups and downs… haves and have nots… sickness and health, I’m reflecting on the many experiences and lessons that marriage has taught us. So here are 30 lessons learned during these first 30 years.

  1. We can change ourselves; we can’t change our spouse.

  2. You want to make God laugh? Tell him your plans for your marriage. Ask God for His will in your marriage

  3. The moment you embrace your differences and stop hating your differences your love will flourish.

  4. You can be right, or you can be happy… choose to be happy!

  5. Don’t go to bed angry.

  6. Never do anything in public that will disrespect your spouse.

  7. What happens in your house stays in your house.

  8. No matter what happens today, God willing you can get it right tomorrow.

  9. Always remember what brought you together. It’s good to reflect.

  10. If God brought you through before, God can bring you through again.

  11. Remember your vows… you made them for a reason

  12. Remember what you’ve been through. Each challenge prepares you for the next one.

  13. Communication, money, and intimacy are the biggest challenges that face a marriage, but communication is at the root.

  14. You were an individual as you entered the marriage and its okay to maintain some individuality.

  15. Next to your relationship with God your marriage is the most important relationship in your life.

  16. Your spouse should be your best friend.

  17. Assume good intention when your spouse communicates with you.

  18. Love is a choice. Choose to love each other every day... (even on days when you don’t “like” each other)

  19. Teamwork is a critical component of a healthy marriage.

  20. Marriage takes work and you must be willing to put in the work.

  21. Spend more time with married couples than single friends.

  22. Pray together.

  23. You may not agree on parenting, but you have to speak with one voice.

  24. Marriage is not always 50 – 50 or 100 – 100. It’s often 80-20 or sometimes 100 – 0.

  25. Working together to serve others draws you closer as a couple.

  26. Study your spouse and speak to them in their Love Language.

  27. Your relationship with your spouse reflects your relationship with God.

  28. Regardless of how you feel, never say anything to hurt your spouse.

  29. No job, no hobby, no family member should be more important than your spouse.

  30. God must be at the center of every healthy marriage.

Mike Watkins Atlanta, GA

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